Friday, March 9, 2012

Turning Point

Well I've been through a few rough patches over the last several months but I've had my good times too. December especially was a really rough month for me, it should have been good as my divorce was finalized and I got everything I wanted in my divorce. The judge pushed it faster for the emotional abuse and I have officially been divorced from Mike for a little over two months. Work was going well, at least so I thought, but on the last day before our Christmas break Joseph gave me a nasty shock telling me that he and Mindy had decided to let me go - but it was ok because he was giving me a Christmas bonus. I nodded my understanding, thanked him for the job, and left for the last time. I immediately called my old grooming teacher Crystal, who'd I'd already talked to about working over the Christmas break so I could earn a little extra money. She gave me a job, for which I was very grateful, so within five minutes of losing my job I had a new one. I went home but didn't keep it together long before I completely fell apart. Melinda, Brent and Molly were over for movie night but I just couldn't keep a happy face and retreated to my room after my mom had gotten me to confess what was wrong.

I could tell I was really worrying my mom over the next week or so, I didn't like to leave my room - and after a fight with my dad my mom found me determined to sleep in my car with the dogs and had to beg me to get me to go back in the house. I was starting to feel like I didn't belong anywhere and was once again seriously wondering what the point of trying was. Christmas had very little appeal for me and I wasn't looking forward to putting on a show for family and pretending I was happy when on the inside I felt like I was screaming.

I started my new job at Crystal's Dog Spa - now Crystal's Dog Spaw as she broke the business deal with her old partner and restarted the business on her own. I knew I had a lot to learn still, as did Crystal. I was terrified I was going to let my old grooming teacher down, I really didn't want to disappoint her and have her regret hiring me. And at first I was only working once or twice a week.

But after I'd been working there for a few weeks Crystal told me that she was going to move me up from back up groomer to her second groomer as I'd proved to be responsible, reliable, and dedicated. I've really liked working for Crystal - I've had my rough days, but I've continued to improve in my grooming and have gotten so many more compliments from both Crystal and her manager when she isn't there, Marci, that it has been a much more pleasant working enviornment for me. I feel like I am more appreciated where I am and I like that when I drive to work I don't have to keep driving around all day. Crystal also lets me take Jack and Priestly to work once a week so they can have a free bath. Jack loves going and playing with the toys in the playpen - but he's recently discovered that he's big enough he can jump out - so if I don't pick up the toy he drops for me he'll jump out and carry it over to me. Priestly loves going - until he realizes he's getting a bath. Then it isn't fun anymore. But I love taking them to work with me. Priestly just tends to sleep on Jack's back for most of the day - though he will bark at the dogs that come in.

One thing I really like about working for Crystal is she knows I'm doing my best - and with her tips and encouragment I've continued to improve. The other day I was halfway done on my last dog and Crystal had already finished - she left to ran a few errands then came back to see how I was doing and was very pleased with how my dog was looking. And yesterday the first teddy bear face I was doing on a dog who's owner had taken a pair of scissors too and made it look awful Marci told me it looked very cute and I'd done it all by myself. I can't say how satisfying it is to know that my work is improving. And I really enjoy working with Crystal again - we can laugh and joke and have a good time at work and sometimes if we are hungry when we are done at the same time we go out for dinner. I have been very blessed to have Crystal as a friend and teacher. She's been very good to me.

I am also very grateful for my parents who've been supportive and have helped me out more than I can even say over the past few months, helping me through the dark pit of depression I've fallen into. I still have my rough days, but I've reached a turning point. I'm getting there. I'm slowly crawling out and I know I'll get there.